The gay kiss of Thanksgiving

Our Contributers take the almighty pen to talk about equal rights and current events around the world. 

He writes for eLLes:

A guy guy, who likes girls girls but also all his fellow human beings…. #equalrights
I’m going to keep it short and sweet (that’s what She OR He, or however They identify said)


The kiss

So, on the 22nd of November 2018, the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, a landmark, and one of the most viewed event on television, showed a gay kiss on camera. Two girls kissing to be precise. It’s pretty cool, right? And we love to love these big moments when they happen.
Although we got to see a different expression of love, the network chose to showcase 2 women kissing, because it’s easier for male patriarchy to consider that and acknowledge lesbians rather than gay men, this little win is still not enough to make me jump up and down and scream victory for my LGBTQ+ brothers and sisters. 

You see, I’m somewhat tired of these moments that some networks or companies will « grant » us every once in a while. It’s like having a bad boyfriend that will make an effort when he realises he messed up but will be totally absent and selfish on a daily basis.
While these big moments are important, and will probably be remembered as cornerstones when the dust settles and while they warm everyone’s heart (well probably not everyone), I don’t want them anymore. 
What I want are the little things, those moments that we all experience on a daily basis and that cisgender people take for granted.

I want to see a couple of guys kissing in the middle of the street and get annoyed at them, not because it’s 2 guys kissing, but because I’m a Parisian douche bag and I’m in a rush to get to brunch and they’re standing right in the middle of the sidewalk.
I want to see a couple of lesbians holding hands or with their hands in each other’s back pocket and take a sneak-snap of them, not because I’m a male perv, but because they have cool purses and I have no idea what to get my girlfriend for Christmas (plus I’m in dire need of a big gesture).

I want to go to a restaurant or a stadium and hold the door for someone who definitely « looks » like a woman, but instead of saying « excuse me this is the men’s bathroom. », I’d just shut up and get to my urinal and make an awkward joke like : « I bet you now realize how much cleaner guy’s bathrooms are. » and he would see in my eyes the look of an ignorant yet good-hearted soul and we’d high five in a glorious moment of acceptance before realising that neither one of us washed their hands.
Actually, I want to have more than just « male » and « female » bathrooms because it’s necessary. 
I want all these little things that have never been an issue for me, to never be an issue for anyone else, and while it’s heartwarming to see a gay kiss on a nationally televised event such as the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, it is still not enough.

We  all like the big gestures, but we all need  the little things.

But for now, I will take solace in imagining some bigoted backwards person squirm in their seat whilst watching the parade and make a bigoted backwards remark. And maybe, that guy’s daughter or son would have had the courage to come out to them, and hopefully, in the spirit of the holiday season, they would have decided to be civil and polite, and maybe they would have realised that everything was still the same and made the actual right choice of being accepting and supportive of their child.
And that would have been a true Christmas miracle for which we could all be thankful.

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